Monday, January 31, 2011 - 9:14 PM
The fear and phobia in UOL exams.
Its supposed to be the final lap for me provided I clear my papers. After failing some of the papers, It had incurred fear and phobia for me. I really do not want to repeat it again. Its really mentally and physically draining roller coaster ride. I blamed myself entirely for not being intelligent & diligent. In short, UOL is not for me. Invested so much time on it, even if I pass its just medicore work. Whats the point of coming UOL when honours classification is important. Major disappointment :'( I really can't cope with the level of stress especially when its near to the exams. (Perhaps there are too many accumulated doubts) Why am I so vulnerable?
I always asked myelf : Why everyone can do it but me!! Why??! I am supposed to graduate last semester and it got delayed. My friends who graduated got decent results in the 2nd hon-ours classification. Why can't I even attain the minimum :(
Now that its my final year. I am still not confident in clearing. Seriously, what am I thinking and what is wrong with me.
The whole academic journey in UOL is miserable to me.
The only thing I'm thankful about is meeting new and nice buddies like Melvin & Jiale...etc
I really hope I'm able to end this journey soon!! I do not want to do it again :(
falling in love~
Friday, January 21, 2011 - 5:59 AM
MelancholyI am feeling so miserable now. I do not want to bother my friends with my problems ;( How do I begin?Nothing seems to be going on track. I am so troubled with my relationship and studies. I just need someone who will be here for me to hear me whines and assure me.
I am taking this miserable journey as a lesson learnt. IF I would to do it right the first time, I won't be facing this problem!
Why am I so vulnerable.
This blog has became my ranting space when I am feeling upset.
I haven't been feeling happy for a long time :(
Looking forward for more happy days.
falling in love~
Sunday, January 09, 2011 - 2:55 AM
Sometimes I still do think about it and blame myself for being stubborn & stupid. The mistakes made me ended up here :'( I hate myself!
falling in love~
Saturday, January 01, 2011 - 10:01 AM
A BRAND NEW YEAR AWAITS ME- HAPPY NEW YEAR :)
Dear Diary,
In the blink of an eye, year 2010 whizzed past me! I can hardly recall the events that took place in year 2010 :X I'm sure I've been through a lot of ups and downs this year. I wanna thank all my friends,family and BF for walking through this journey with me. I am sure we have gained a lot through experience and mistakes made in the past. Hopefully, we'll be able to learn from it and not to dwell over those unhappiness events. I always believe in these phrases " What that does not kill you make you stronger " , " Don't cry because its over, smile because it happened" , " Everything happens for a reason"
The summer of 2010 will remain etched in my memory for a long time to come. This summer, amidst all the fun,laughter and crazy moments. I found that i rediscovered myself in many ways. i learnt the meaning of courage and what it entails, i learnt how to let go, i learnt to accept things for what they are, i learnt to fight for what i want, i learnt to forgive and forget, i learnt that not everything has to have a reason, i learnt to be less skeptical, i learnt to trust more, but mostly, i learnt to not look back and regret, because whatever it is, at one time, it was exactly what i wanted.
I always believe that everything will work out in the end, life has its mysterious ways of turning out right. Perhaps it’s because we make the conscious (and optimistic) choice to see it as that, or maybe it’s because sometimes that’s the only way to go. but whatever it is, its true what they say, that sometimes, good things fall apart so that better things can come together.
Wishing all of you a blessed new year ahead! May you be filled with abundance of happiness, tons of happy returns and accomplishments. Best wishes to all of you & Cheers on embarking a brand new year ahead.
^^
Recently, I was really upset about life! I posted something on FB. I am truly touched that some of my friends still bother to check out on me (despite me being MIA for so long) Thank you Max! The phone-call made my day :) To Sylvester & Melvin, thank you for being my pair of listening ears always! <3
falling in love~
